Thursday, February 25

I miss my Cupcake Princess.


I miss my Baking Buddy Regina. I really do. I remember our last time baking together. She had already lost ability to use her right hand and struggled to stir her cupcake dough. I had to help her. BUT she did it. I remember how she used her left hand and placed paper cupcake liners into pan. I remember helping her back to her sofa where she patiently waited cupcakes to be ready. I remember her eating 3-4 at a time ( she was on steroids),.. And that was last time she ever baked of prepared us something. . I have baked cupcakes once since then. It was very hard thing for me to do.****
I have not felt like writing. I think about writing, I have opened up this blog many time and type couple of sentences but then I erase it. I have lot to say, I HAVE lot in my mind and I wish I was in happier better place, but I am not. I am still very broken inside. Still hurting, still crying and holding back tears when I am at public place and something reminds me of Regina. I avoid going to LNES because I see "her Friends", I avoid people because I feel like I can't handle hugs and we are thinking of you comments...I do fun things and GO OUT, but oftentimes instead of smiling I wanted to cry..

7 comments:

KMGheno said...

Sorry to have missed you guys last weekend; next time for sure. Regina is never far from my thoughts.

You look lovely dahling.

niisama said...

Di, You look amazing!!! And I'm not saying just because, you do.
Thank you for your post after so long...

Kathy said...

You do look great.

Healing has it's own time, your friends will wait.

Kathy said...

And I LOVE that photo of Regina :)

Dymesha Wheeler said...

You're entitled to feel sad sometimes. Although you say you're in a said place I still read amazing strength in your words. Just know that when you feel like writing I'll be here.

Joanna Hammond said...

Ah Diana, it's a process. Take your time, and don't worry about healing on someone else's timetable. Do what feels right for you and your family! Hugs, my friend!!

Patty said...

Losing a child is something you never get over completely. You will always remember her in little things said and done, also little things you still find in your home. Just looking at her Father, because I think she resembled her Father very much. She was a blessing and loved by so many. You will never forget her, but it will get easier as time goes by. Much love and give Gabriel a hug from me.